Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway. That’s the title of one of my favorite books of all time by the late Susan Jeffers. And it perfectly illustrates why courage creates the secure husband. I’m Bruce Abbott, a certified professional coach and founder of securehusband.com, helping good men stop avoiding discomfort and start leading their … Read more
Why do so many good men accept less than they deserve in marriage and in life? It’s because they’re settling. And settling isn’t love. It’s low self-worth. I work with good men who want to stop living small and start leading from a place of strength, courage, and emotional maturity. And one of the biggest … Read more
Welcome back to step four in our six step article series on the Secure Husband Process. So step one, you noticed—you just noticed where you’ve been abandoning yourself. Step two, you made the conscious, courageous decision to take action. Now we’ll figure out what that action is later. In step three, you learned a dialogue … Read more
In step one, you just noticed. In step two, you chose intentionally to act. And in step three, we’re gonna heal the wounded child. I. Welcome back to The Secure Husband Article, Bruce Abbott, certified professional coach and founder of SecureHusband.com, where I help good men stop feeling lost in their marriage. This is the … Read more
If you’re a married man who feels disrespected by your wife, it’s probably eating away at you. You don’t want to lash out. You don’t want to shut down. But the sarcasm, the eye rolls, the tone—it hits a nerve. It feels personal. It feels unfair. And it probably feels like it’s happening way too … Read more
Self-sacrifice is not love. It’s not leadership. It’s not strength. It’s not noble. It’s a lie that sounds right and feels right, but deep down it’s not love—it’s a trauma response. And if you’re a man who’s always bending over backward to keep the peace in your marriage… always giving and giving and giving while … Read more
Trying to control the uncontrollable is exhausting. And if you’re a husband who feels stuck, frustrated, or desperate for your wife to change—her affection, her interest in sex, her attitude toward you—you’re not alone. But the more you try to manage her emotions, the more disconnected things become. And it’s likely breaking your heart. You … Read more
“I pretty much married the first woman who would give me attention.” A client said that to me not long ago, and it stopped me in my tracks. If you’ve ever felt that way — like you settled because someone saw you when no one else did — this is for you. Let’s unpack this. … Read more
You crave closeness. She craves space. You try to connect, and she pulls away. You want intimacy, vulnerability, and emotional safety. She seems calm, guarded, and emotionally distant. At first, it felt magnetic. Now it just feels like pain. And you find yourself asking: “Why am I so attracted to avoidant women? Why do I … Read more
You try to connect. You get vulnerable. You reach out. And she pulls away. She shuts down. She avoids eye contact. She gives short, flat answers. There’s no warmth. No tenderness. No emotional intimacy. And you’re left asking: “What do I do if my wife is emotionally disconnected or avoidant?” If you’ve ever felt like … Read more