pursuer distancer dynamic

No Villains, No Heroes: Healing a Dysfunctional Marriage

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No One Is the Monster and No One Is the Hero in a Struggling Marriage If you’re struggling in your marriage, no one partner is the monster, and no one partner is the hero either. You have both built the dysfunction. When marriages hurt, it’s easy to fall into extremes. You might tell yourself that … Read more

The Pursuer-Distancer Dynamic

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In this corner we have the pursuer. And in this corner, the distancer. Have you ever heard of the pursuer-distancer dynamic? It’s loosely tied to the concept of the anxious or preoccupied attachment husband and the avoidant attachment wife. One is always trying, trying, trying, trying, doing all the work, while the other one is … Read more